Today a new laptop arrived in the mail for my husband, Douglas. This was not an easy purchase.
On Monday morning, my husband’s laptop experienced the dreaded blue screen of death. As it’s from 2010–which some could argue is fairly ancient in computer years–it’s been on its way out for awhile, racking up more issues than celebrity children.
Unfortunately, this technical breakdown occurred in the morning. That’s right, the morning.
If you’re hip to Hormonology, then you know why this was pretty bad timing: In the male 24-hour hormone cycle, testosterone is highest in the early hours of the day, making guys more likely to get easily ticked off.
So, when I helpfully suggested we simply upgrade his laptop to a shnazzy new one with a touch-screen like mine, it was like lighting the fuse to a bomb: For no good reason, this sent Douglas’s irritation into overdrive. He fumed. He paced. He had steam coming out of his ears. No amount of cajoling or rationalizing could make him happy.
And while his uncharacteristic outburst should have been annoying, to be honest, it had me laughing (out of his view, of course). That’s because I got a taste of what he puts up with when (on very, very rare occasion) I lose it during my premenstrual week.
And then I remembered all I really needed to do was to wait it out. Because not only would a little passing time cool him off, once his testosterone dipped in the afternoon, he’d be less prone to getting easily irritated and more open to the idea of replacing his old laptop with a new one.
By 2 pm right after lunch, sure enough, Douglas was way more calmed down. And when I suggested we go shopping for new laptops, he grudgingly agreed. Then, when we arrived at the store, he promptly filled with joyful glee upon seeing all the options he could have that his current laptop lacks. Lower testosterone to the rescue!
And today, Douglas virtually bounded up the stairs to tell me the new laptop we ordered for him arrived and he couldn’t wait to set it up. A far cry from the fuming I saw on Monday morning.
The takeaway: When a guy around you is irritated over something in the morning–like your partner, co-worker, friend, roommate–rather than try to resolve the issue when his testosterone is high, making him irritated and stubborn, if you can, simply wait it out. Not only will the passing time help chill him out, by mid-afternoon, his lower testosterone level will be making him more relaxed, flexible and open to change.
Try this one out–then let me know how it works for you!
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